Welcome Home

Home sweet home! That was a long ass week. Lately I had been flying back Thursday night so I could be home all day Friday, but my schedule didn’t allow for it this time. I flew back Friday morning, which was nice because I wasn’t rushed to get to the airport in Pittsburgh rush hour traffic, but lame because it was one more night away from home with a 4:30 wake up call to get to the airport. Meh.

I snacked on the last of my travel food on the flights: hb eggs, clementines, the last of the trail mix, and an entire bag of carrots which I suspect is the cause of the stomach ache I experienced. I didn’t want to eat them all, but for some reason I didn’t want to bring a half-eaten bag of carrots home. I don’t know why; Squish and Hulk would have made quick work of them. Anyway, I ate almost a pound of carrots for brunch. And there you go.

I got home a little after lunchtime, so Hulk and I had a lunch date at Chipotle.

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Mmm, chicken salad with guac. Welcome home!

I feel really accomplished that I managed to eat fairly healthy and resist most of the temptations of the business trip. I still drank beer, and there were a couple of dairy bombs that I could have avoided, but all in all I stuck to my guns about avoiding sugar, gluten, and dairy when it was obvious, and I think some of my issues are starting to clear up. I’m not back to feeling totally awesome yet, but I know I’m on my way.

I also really, really think gluten makes me depressed. I remember after I reintroduced gluten grains back last year when I did my Whole30, I noticed that I would have a croissant or bagel for breakfast, and about 12 hours later, I would just be sad for no reason. Nothing in my environment had changed, but it was like a cloud came over my brain and turned a light off. This sort of alarms me, if it’s true. I always thought I had sort of a propensity to the blues. I just sort of accepted it as part of my genetics, since it tends to run in families. But maybe the real inherited trait is an intolerance for gluten and not some sort of permanent brain chemical defects? It’s comforting to think I might be able to control my symptoms with my diet. I’ll keep up my loose gluten avoidance for a few more weeks an see what I find out. I’m not avoiding all gluten everywhere – I’m not reading ingredient labels and I’m still drinking beer – I’m just avoiding bread and stuff. Maybe after a few weeks I’ll see where I’m at and maybe tighten down my allowance further. Intersting stuff …

Anyway, Squish decided right before bedtime was the time to play his drum.

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Then he saw I was taking pictures of him and wanted my phone.

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And then, tears and screams.

Oh, he also dumped a cup of milkshake on our new rug. This is how you get ants.

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Plus, I have a big, stinky, sticky stain to deal with. Later. It’s beer o’clock now.

Happy Friday, and have a great weekend!

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All the Salads

Oh my gosh, you guys. I am really, really tired. And tired of salads. But mostly just tired. Darn jet lag.

Because this is the only interesting content that’s happened to me in the past 48 hours, let me show you all the food. That’s mostly salad.

Hotel breakfast buffet of sausage patty, some sort of sausage-potato-pepper hash, and fruit.

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This looks like it would be a good salad, but the chicken was so dry I might as well have eaten the styrofoam container. Plus, I put the beets over the strawberries, and that was a mistake.

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Banana and AB snack

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Dinner #1: lettuce salad, fruit, and the olives and artichoke off of the Mediterranean skewers.

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Dinner #2 (after I worked out and was ravenous). Much better! Take-out salmon, taters, and mixed veggies. French onion soup for dessert (yes, I splurged on the cheese and croutons).

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Breakfast buffet #2: canadian bacon and oh, more fruit. Plus 2 hb eggs I had in my room.

Hmm, thought I had a picture. Oh, well.

Lunch was the same as yesterday, only more eggplant and less beets.

Dinner: hamburger patty and veggies. Much, much better.

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And the obligatory post-work-but-still-working glass of complimentary chablis.

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Not pictured: several packets of tuna, and some fruit smuggled to work from the breakfast buffet as afternoon snacks.

Still making the food plan work on the road. It’s frustrating at times. I was so ready to throw in the towel yesterday and dive in to all of the appetizers the hotel buffet was serving that would have totally derailed me and given me a stomach ache. The difference now is that I really want to feel healthy again, and the only way to do that is to stay away from the stuff that I know makes me crappy.

I’m rather spent, so here’s an appropriate meme I found on Pinterest. Fortunately it didn’t apply to me today, but there are always those days …

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Happy hump day!

Travel Food

Whelp, I’m in Pittsburgh again. Whoop.

I know this is, like, completely a unique circumstance to everyone, but I have a hard time keeping to my healthy guns when traveling. I know, I know. It’s supposed to be so easy, why is it that I find it so hard?

Last time, knowing I would be working long hours and surrounded by brew pubs and crummy cafeteria/hotel buffet food for sustenance, I packed along some “healthy” snacks so I wasn’t so pressured to fuel up on whatever sad chicken salad was being served while I was out. It was a smashing success, so I did a repeat with some slight changes this time.

Behold my snack bag of glory (from the plane):

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Tuna in a pack, hb eggs, carrots, a little tub o’ coconut oil, almond butter packs, homemade trail mix (mixed nuts, flaked coconut, raisins), and a half dozen clementines.

I was amazed that the hotel happy hour actually had stuff I could eat.

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Ham, green beans, and salad. Oh, that beer? I don’t know how that beer got there …

I mean, it’s not perfectly Whole30-approved clean eating. I ended up using 1/2 a packet of Kraft I-Can’t-Believe-It’s-Not-Caesar dressing on my salad since there was no olive oil and I’ll be dammed if I’m eating a fat-free dressing, eww. At least it’s not pizza and french fries. So I’m cool with that.

Oh, hey, I got a haircut.

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Drastic, no? I was sick of doing my hair in the morning. The best part is when I’m working and getting all stressed out, and it start sticking out all over the place because I keep running my hands through it.

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Yeah, like that.

And here’s a freakin’ adorable Squish pic, because he’s at home with daddy and I miss him.

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We found a hat! It’s fun to take hats on and off, on and off.

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And if I do this, no one can seeeeee meeeeee!

Time to let the jet lag catch up. Have a most wonderful week!

Three Days of Catch-Up, the Borscht Edition

I know some of my comments about “failing” and the “mistakes” I make probably seem trivial. For most people, eating a croissant is probably not the worst thing in the world to do. There are a lot of less healthy stuff out there, like meth and crawling in sewage systems. And I don’t want to seem like I’m beating up on myself; I’m not. I can’t make myself feel bad for every less-healthy option I have ever chosen. That’s a bit of a waste of perfectly good energy. But I do need to stop thinking that I “deserve a treat” or that “just one won’t hurt”.

I came up with a new analogy for health. To me, health like a bucket of water that is filled or emptied by drops. Doing good things add drops to the health bucket, and doing bad things take away drops. I know this is a simplistic analogy, but hang with me here. So having one croissant? No big, it’s just one drop removed from the bucket. Every day? Mmm, you might notice something. Every day, plus after-lunch cookies and a couple glasses of wine at night? Before you know it, your bucket is half empty and your pants are a little full. I have to remind myself that every decision is a drop – how do I want to spend it?

Okay, enough with the deep stuff. Let me back up a little bit on current events. It’s been a while so let’s catch up.

Wednesday night was a lot of this.

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I went to a social networking meetup group at a wine bar in North Beach. Such good sangiovese, and so much of it! I may have overindulged. Much anticipated bucket drops, I assure you.

Thursday I remembered to pack breakfast as well as lunch (yay!). I threw a few hb eggs and the last of the root veggie hash in a box on my way out the door. This is what it looked like after I finally finished it off:

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Lunch was leftover salmon, brussel sprouts, and sweet taters. I had to eat it in the break room because I didn’t want to disturb my coworkers near my desk with stinky fish.  20140124-074303.jpg

I did have a chocolate. My coworker just got back from Hawaii and brought back some Hawaiian chocolates. The ones with the little macadamia nut inside. It would have been rude of me to refuse, you know.

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Dinner was a quick hash of beef, cabbage, and butternut squash. Even though Squish had already had his dinner, he still crawled up in my lap to help me with my squash. Hee-hee, Squish eating squash. Funny words. Anyway, I think he’s over whatever crud he had over the weekend, his horse-like appetite is definitely back.

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Got my usual 5:30 am Squishy wake-up call this morning. Lately he’s been waking up at the butt crack of dawn and coming into our room to pull me out of bed and play with him. Let’s just say I’m not quite in the playing mood at 5:30 in the morning, a half hour before my alarm is supposed to go off. We usually shoo him out and set him up in front of the TV with some Sesame Street and a sippy cup of milk, but Hulk was out of town this week so I ended up letting Squish crawl in bed with me. He fell right back asleep, so I was torn between “I should have sent him back to his own bed” and “Aww! Baby snuggle time!”

Breakfast was half a chicken breast and a few bites of roasted beets as I ran out the door. I was ravenous all day. Ate 1/2 an avocado for mid-morning snack, along with a couple cups of coffee with generous splashes of soy milk (I know not the best option, but it’s that or those little tubs of creamer and they just don’t do it for me) then the rest of the avocado on my “usual” lunch of beef/butternut squash/brussel sprouts. I gotta say, this is the first time the weekly prep thing worked out 100%. I ate from my own fridge almost every meal this week, and now on Friday night I might have enough to scrounge up lunch tomorrow, but for the most part the fridge is cleaned out. Which is fine since I’m out of town next week 🙂 Hulk’s turn to hold down the fort!

I also won “employee of the week”. NBD.

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The real reward is this super awesome poster you get to display somehow on your desk.

I also grabbed a short latte at Starbucks with a coworker, and had an apple and a pack of peanuts to get me through the late afternoon. And a few dates sprinkled throughout the day. And maybe a beer with coworkers. I was completely ravenous for most of the day; I think my crappy breakfast-ing is catching up to me. Wow, and you don’t realize how fast snacking catches up to you. I think about my actual *meals* and was like, oh, I didn’t eat much today. I’ve been doing a pretty decent job with my food log and as I looked at it I was like, “Oh yeah, and the dates. And the apple. And the … and the …”

Then I came home to dinner already made! Our babysitter is from Russia, and she made borscht for us. It was so sweet of her, and the most fabulous homemade soup I’ve had in a long time! I’ve never had borscht before, but I love beets so I knew it would be scrumptious.

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The picture is a little weird; I had already started to stir in the sour cream before I remembered to snap it. She also made a green salad as a first course. It was a perfect dinner to kick off the weekend. I had a clementine for dessert. Might have another one two or three yet, mmm.

Well, the kid’s in bed. Time to kick back with some wine and hang out with friends. Hope you all have a happy weekend, if I don’t see you before Monday!

Socially Awkward Fail and the Day’s Eats

I had this really awesome idea for a post intro this morning. It was going to be all eloquent and introspective and stuff. And now since this intro is neither eloquent nor introspective, you are safe to assume I forgot my idea as soon as I sat down to write it. Boo.

I also have an awesomely embarrassing fail to share with you. Okay, it’s not that awesome. It just goes to show how I keep making bad decisions.

So, I decided this weekend to go off sugar, dairy, and grains. Not really a Whole30, but as close as I can make it without driving myself nuts. On Monday I had a ham and cheese croissant for breakfast. I felt dumb since I told myself I would take care to eat real food for breakfast. Tuesday, I managed to slam down 1/2 an avocado and some rotisserie chicken straight from the fridge as I ran out the door. A while after I got to work, my boss announced that he was going to get a croissant breakfast sandwich at the deli, and would anyone like to join him? A few of my coworkers went, and since I’m still kind of new and I’m trying to make work friends I spontaneously jumped in the elevator with everyone.

We get to the deli, and I end up first in line. I order my croissant sandwich, and wait for the others. My boss, the instigator in this whole exercise, was last in line. Which was unfortunate because by the time they got to him, all the croissants were gone. I felt ridiculous. I don’t even need this damn sandwich, I’m not that hungry (kind of hungry, but more of a hard-boiled-egg-and-I’m-fine hungry rather than a monstrous-breakfast-sandwich-hungry), and I shouldn’t be eating this thing anyway. I offered my croissant, but it was politely refused. By the time I got to my desk I just slammed the whole thing down out of embarrassment and guilt. #SociallyAwkwardPenguin.

So, what can I do differently next time? For one, don’t join in. But if I want to jump in for the social interaction, for pete’s sake don’t order a damn croissant. The deli serves all sorts of food I could totally eat: egg dishes, fruit or veggie salad, beverages like coffee and tea. I have other options. Finally, if all other options failed I could have been more insistent when I offered my croissant up. Be like, “no, you take it” and just drop it and walk away or something. I just need to not get so freaked out and freeze up in uncomfortable situations. But I’m sure I’m the only one in the world who has minor social anxiety issues. Which is also why I blog and not, you know, talk to real humans.

Anyway, that was my only real indiscretion yesterday. The rest of it went pretty well as planned.

Finished the chicken stock up from the weekend prep and had a delicious cup o’ broth straight from the pot.

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GHOMG it was sooo good.

Lunch was another rendition of “look all of the food I made this weekend; I should eat all of it at once” beef hash/root veggie hash/sauteed mushrooms/brussel sprouts bowl of glory.

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I also ate about 400 clementines. Partly because I was craving sugar and partly because I just like them. They make my hands smell nice.

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Wasn’t there some movie line like “smell my fingers”? Or is that just a random thing? It might be dirty; I hope that doesn’t offend. I tend to be oblivious to that kind of stuff.

Anyway, I made salmon for dinner. With sweet taters and some sauteed cabbage.

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I felt kind of bad making my own dinner. Our new babysitter has been making dinner for us, but she did a stir-fry with spaghetti noodles last night so I didn’t want to eat it. It looked really good though. She’s a good cook.

I had some major snuggle time with a certain little man. Between his sickness, the new babysitter, and all of our work travel he’s been pretty out-of-sorts cranky and clingy lately. Like, it never used to phase him when I left for work. Now every morning when he sees me zip up my jacket the screaming waterworks start. So I’m trying to spend time with him when I can and hope this phase passes soon.

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But seriously, how can you resist a cuddle with that face?

Finally, welcome to the “FML” moment of the day. Hulk texted me from abroad that he was trying to avoid diet coke, and it was hard because the office he was working from is filled with it. I responded with these pics from our break room:

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I get to avoid all this. Every day. Oh, and there’s a whole fridge of soda and fruit juice smoothie thingys that I ignore, too. Don’t get me wrong; I love how giving and accommodating my employer is by providing free snacks. And there is a lot of stuff I can eat: they have a ton of fresh fruit and veggies, beef jerky, trail mix that’s just nuts and dried fruit, etc. But you have to consciously reach past the chips and candy to get to it 🙂 Some days are harder than others to avoid. Actually, MOST days are harder than others to avoid. Always something to work on.

Here’s to life, adventure, and fighting the good fight.

All the Food, Urgent Care Adventures, and a Long Savasana

So, I spent two hours on Sunday doing weekly food prep.

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Soooo muuuuuch fooooood. I ran out of containers to put everything in. #paleoproblems

The family went out and enjoyed the nice weather on Sunday. We wandered around the Golden Gate Bridge with 10,000 of our favorite tourist friends.

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Still doesn’t suck.

And Squishy contemplated how much sand he could eat at Stinson Beach.

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“Oh, great! Mom gave me a giant spoon with which to eat All The Sand!”

I came down with the sniffles while traveling last week, and I brought them home to Squish. Sunday night he was breathing really weird and it worried me. Like, short, raspy breaths. So off to Urgent Care we went.

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Selfies while waiting for the doctor. I think I look more sick and tired than he does.

The rule of Urgent Care is if you go, it’s probably nothing. And if you don’t go, it’s something super serious and you’re a horrible parent for not taking them. So 1 1/2 hours of waiting for the doctor later, Squish has congestion, cough, and a mild fever and his breathing is normal for a kid with these symptoms. Yeah, he’s fine. Glad he took up the spot from another kid that has a real illness.

After getting home around 11:00, I was really glad I did all that food prep since lunch was a snap to prepare.

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Ground beef, root veggie hash, and brussel sprouts.

Plus a mid-afternoon snack of banana and peanut butter. I ended up only eating half the banana, it was huge.

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Couldn’t say the same thing about breakfast, though. In my hurry to make the train on time I didn’t bother to eat breakfast so I made a bad decision to pick up a ham and cheese croissant and coffee with cream at the train station cafe. Their croissants are glorious, but since I’m trying to stay away from dairy and gluten it was not the best decision. I realized after the fact (as always) that there is plenty of stuff I can eat at work – fresh fruit and trail mix that’s all nuts and stuff. So lesson learned, I can eat at work if need be.

At least dinner was great too.

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I met a friend for yoga, and we stopped for dinner first. This was a beet, walnut, arugula, and goat cheese salad as big as my head. I only made it through about 2/3 of it.

Yoga was a surreal experience. The class is supposed to go from 7:15 – 9:00 which is a bit long and late for me, but the instructor is amazing. The class was a perfect balance of crazy sweaty intense flows and easy-ish more restorative poses. By the time we were in savasana, I was so zen’ed out I fell asleep during savasana (in a puddle of my own sweat) and was dreaming and stuff. The instructor uses incense to wake you from savasana so by the time I came to I was so restored and relaxed. Then I looked at my phone. 9:30! We had gone a half hour over and no one noticed. I guess that’s being in the present for you.

I got home at 10:30 and washed my yoga mat. It was horrendous. I made my own yoga mat spray that I found on Pinterest and gave it a whirl after I scrubbed the mat with soap and water in the tub. We’ll see if it smells like lavender tonight, or like death and I need a new mat. If it works I’ll post the spray recipe.

Then I ate a hard boiled egg and some carrot sticks that were leftover from lunch while reading my Kindle in bed.

And that’s all for my weekend-plus-Monday update.

 

 

Changing 1 1/2 Handfuls Later

Lately I’ve been trying to climb back on the paleo/primal bandwagon. Which is seemingly more challenging than when I initially started switching to paleo. At least, from what I remember. I’ve been trying to use my old tricks and mental mind games. Like, when I feel like I just want to dive face-first into a Safeway bakery sheet cake, I start texting friends or talk to coworkers or otherwise reach out to people to break whatever mental spell I seem to be entranced by. Or, when I want to eat something less healthy I ask, “would I rather eat this cheese doodle/cupcake/stale bar of chocolate, or bacon?” The answer is always bacon. Just thinking about bacon instantly removes any other craving and replaces it with a bacon craving. And I’m okay with bacon craving.

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So after lunch as I was working at home yesterday,  I got sort of carb crave-y. We had a leftover bag of stale tortilla chips in the closet, and without thinking I mindlessly grabbed a handful and chowed down. About halfway through my second handful I stopped. What the hell was I doing? For starters, the chips are stale. They don’t even taste good. Second, I don’t need this food. Upon further review, I’m actually hungry, not cravy. I want to eat food. Real food.

So I got my lazy butt up and into the kitchen where I threw down a quickie spinach and tuna salad.

And then I found $5.

No, I didn’t, really. That’s just how I end stories where the climax isn’t quite where I want it to be.

The point is, it’s never to late to stop the crap habits and change them to new ones. Even if you’re already 1 1/2 handfulls of stale chips in.

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Conqured.

A Wiggle and a Jiggle

It’s sort of refreshing to start posting again. Exciting, even. I really don’t know what I’m going to talk about, but I’m sure something will happen that’s blog-worthy. Until a cohesive topic strikes, here is some randomness. I got a haircut. And some cute new gym clothes. I needed some motivation to get back to […]

New Year, New Blog?

What’s up, my bloggies?!? Where do I even start? It’s been two months since my last post. Not too much has changed. Duke went to the big dog park in the sky. Squish is getting bigger and more squish-tastic every day. Hulk and I are both still traveling a lot. Traveling separately, unfortunately. So far not any fun trips as it’s all been for work. And I am still trying and failing at this whole “healthy” thing.

You’d think that with a new year would come new changes, new feelings of drive and accomplishment, new desires. Every year is the same for me. Every year I’m like, “this will be my year to get fit!” And every December I’m standing in the wake thinking, “well, that didn’t go well”. The other day I was cleaning out some old files from my computer, and I found my New Years resolution notes I wrote for 2008. 2008! Six years ago. And you know what they were? Lose weight. Kick ass at my job and get promoted. Be a better friend. Cook more and get organized in the house. Guess which resolutions made the list for 2014? If you guessed, “all of the above,” here is your gold star.

You can frame it if you’d like.

Anyway, I thought it is high time I regroup and get some support. And by support I mean blogging and facing the judgement of the internet. Nothing says “don’t eat that muffin” like attempting to be a transparent “healthy” food blogger and knowing you will be facing the scorn of invisible talking heads hiding behind keyboards.

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Of course, I have just about as much time for this as I had before. Which means none. Which is kind of the reason I haven’t posted in about two months. But I’m sort of pondering what I want this blog to be now, the direction I want it to go. I’m not running anymore (more about that some other time), I haven’t been cooking a whole lot, and I work a ton. But I guess it’s still the story of me, living it up in the city and making the most of it. Which is pretty much anyone’s story, really.

So here’s to a new year. Whether or not it will be a new blog or not is up to the fates and my creative impulses to decide.

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And let’s keep it realistic, people.